| Wah wah waaahhhh! |
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| 12:03am 01/03/2008 |
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Safe to say I'm battling some nasty dermatitis! Pink splotches/red rash that is on my knuckles and runs up to my fingahs! D:
I needs my Vaseline Hand and Nail lotion. It works wonderfully to cure this... I am stuck using my mother's Mary Kay Private Spa Collection "extra emollient night cream". I suppose I should feel special, but I just feel greasy. I have a thing of clean hands, I really do. Let's just hope this stuff works.
But oh my god. A bra documentary on National Geographic!
Bras have been created for everything. There's one that can call the police, there was one that could detect missiles.
And the largest bra ever created was a 48V...V Can you imagine! I have enough issue with my head being able to fit into a DDD cup. They make excellent hats by the way. |
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| These thoughts of mine. |
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| 08:37pm 04/02/2008 |
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mood:  crushed music: The Fan
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1. Every human experiences life in a different way. My experience isn't any more important than yours, so quit the one-ups-manship. It gets annoying.
2. I get it. You don't have to further emphasize anything to me. If you don't want me there, just tell me. I'll handle it better that way.
3. I'm a lot more clued into the world than what you think...probably more so than you are.
4. I wait for myself to screw up because I know I'm going to do it and will beat myself up over it.
5. I hate working with insecure fat women.
6. I'm extremely self confident except when it comes to my own standing and worth in a relationship.
7. I know I'm not perfect and don't have an issue admitting it. Deal with it. That's true self confidence.
8. Your own facade of superiority is starting to crack and your weakness are coming through. Leave my plain as day ones alone and quit putting your own issues on me.
9. Turning over a new leaf against bitchiness does not mean being a bitch in a nice way.
10. I'm too touchy feely? Get the fuck off my lap then and quit butt humping me in the mall.
11. This may surprise you. But I'm a damn responsible 20 year old who's all to aware of the real world.
12. I like to drink, but I don't like to get drunk.
13. The idea of doing drugs bores me.
14. I've been driven to the point of wanting to do drugs before.
15. I want to grow up, but then again, I don't. Life's forcing me too.
16. I don't every step I take in life, but I've gotten good in faking confidence in my decisions.
17. I don't believe I can dance.
18. Inaccuracy in words and facts bother me.
19. I move on to new people once the old people run out of good stories to tell me.
20. I know I'm not pretty no matter how many times people tell me. I just can't believe it.
21. I go through a psychological melt down every time I have to try on a new outfit.
22. I fear living alone.
23. I think very people care how I feel...and even then, they only care a little bit.
24. I'm a lot quieter than what people believe me to be.
25. I'm a fat women with many more self conscious thoughts and worries than I should have.
26. I'm an idealist.
27. I cling to the idea of a positive change for tomorrow while holding to the ideals of long past.
28. Yes, that's right. I can kick your ass.
29. I doubt my choice in career everyday.
30. I know I'll be okay. |
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| >.> 'Kay..uhm. |
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| 03:51pm 05/01/2008 |
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Yoda...it is. |
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| Oh.Mai.Gawd.Yey. |
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| 11:14pm 24/12/2007 |
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mood:  geeky
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So for some reason, my parents wanted to open Christmas presents tonight at like 10:00 instead of tomorrow morning.
And boy, did I get a haul. I don't think I can thank them enough. :3!
So, for starters, I got the two coats from Lane Bryant I'd been lusting after. :3 The green furry one and the black sweater trench. *dance* I gots a nice, new pair of pajamas that I won't be able to wear until after I get over my cold... ><; Being sick raises my body temperature unbelievably....I'm starting to sweat sitting here just typing. ;_;
Uhm, I got an Amy Brown 2008 calendar and some faerie clings that are going on my fridge when I get back to the apartment. I got two new Chinese brocade purses. X3 And a change purse to match. There is a paper shredder and an 18 count of Easy Mac my dad wanted to get me for Christmas.
And finally...
I was given a Playstation 3. OH.MAI.GAWD. And it's the 80GB one too, so I can play all my old PS2 games and such, the only downside is I don't think it has a memory card slot... D: Which is not necessarily a bad thing. Except when it comes to FF12, which if I'm sneaky enough, I can get the PS2 back to the apartment as well...
That's it for now folks... Hope you all had the best haul like I did.
<3 |
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| 12:02am 24/11/2007 |
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mood:  aggravated
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despite it being hell week. :3
Anywhoozle. I finally bought myself the hoodie at Torrid that I've been lusting over for forever. I got it and some fancy shmancy bangles for twenty dollars less than what the original cost of the hoodie was. Fwee! [url=http://www.torrid.com/torrid/store/product.jsp?FOLDER%3C%3Efolder_id=2534374302025454&PRODUCT%3C%3Eprd_id=845524442164934&bmUID=1195880356625]This thing is gorgeous.[/url]. I got some beautiful bangles too, and you know what, it was still twenty dollars that it would have been.
I'm still at the first step of Hoodie Lovers Anonymous. I admit to having a problem, though there's not really anything I want to do about it yet. :3
Blitz Day was not bad, but I worked the end of it...so yeah.
Also, my manager scheduled for me for December 1. I gave her a not and even explained it to her that I needed it off for a doctor's appointment. It's an eye doctor's appointment, and I'm having my eyes dilated. You know, it's been two years since my last appointment. I need new contacts, and I've broken my glasses. ><; Damnit. However, I followed my mom's advice and kept a copy of the letter I gave her. >.> Punta, por favor.
Anyways, night ya'll. I'm going to go work on homework. |
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| My thoughts on the holiday season. |
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| 06:54pm 20/11/2007 |
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Fahk it.
It rips my family to shreds. |
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| Thanksgiving with the Cranks |
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| 09:36am 20/11/2007 |
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Everyone who's been free to get to whatever they want to do is in a cranky mood. My was in a cranky mood last night, and my granpa's been in a cranky mood for the past two days. Unless I wasn't told the Linda and Roger don't come until Wednesday, but he said they were coming today and then precisely ordered me to pick up all my stuff that was laying out like the glasses I left lying on the table... When he told me this, I was wearing my glasses.... >.> I swear he thinks I'm the most horrible person ever.
Also, a kid's game that revolves around packing the back of an SUV with as much stuff as possible? WTF, man? WTF? |
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| >> |
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| 10:49am 18/11/2007 |
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music: Wake Up Call: Maroon 5
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My dad is really pissing me off this morning.... oi vey. *forehead slam*
OMG! Project Runway for the win! |
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| Stolen from teh Bessu who stole it from somebody else |
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| 02:37pm 14/11/2007 |
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mood:  weird music: All kinds.
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1. If someone says “is this okay?” you say,
"I Got Rhythm" from the Take the Lead soundtrack
=.=; WTF, mate? "Takin' it back to old school?"
2. How would you describe yourself?
"Suffocate" by Finger 11
Okay, I can see this one
3. What do you like in a guy/girl?
Mexico by Incubus...
So, flexibility, ehn? ;D
4. How do you feel today?
Got Me Going by Ra
...
5. What is your life’s purpose?
I'm Not in Love by Enrique Iglesias and Kelis
To have a bunch of hot and dry one night stands and never fall in love? ...god, please no.
6. What is your motto?
La Tortura by Shakira and what's his name.
...*snicker*
7. What do your friends think of you?
Take Me Away by Ra
o.o; That's a bit ambiguous....
8. What do you think of your parents?
Stay With Me (Unlikely) by Celldweller
.....hahahahahahaha.... *sad laughter* (Also, I didn't think the Gypsy Song from the Queen of the Damned qualifies)
9. What do you think about very often?
You Learn by Alania Morissette
10. What is 2 + 2?
Counting Bodies Like Sheep by A Perfect Circle
XD
11. What do you think of your best friend?
Better Than Me: Hinder
...so creepily true... ;-;
12. What do you think of the person you like?
"Missing" by Evanescence
So true....
13. What is your life story?
Drag You Down - Finger 11
[ Error: Irreparable invalid markup ('<b?15.>') in entry. Owner must fix manually. Raw contents below.] <b>1. If someone says “is this okay?” you say,</b>
"I Got Rhythm" from the Take the Lead soundtrack
=.=; WTF, mate? "Takin' it back to old school?"
<b>2. How would you describe yourself?</b>
"Suffocate" by Finger 11
Okay, I can see this one
<b>3. What do you like in a guy/girl?</b>
Mexico by Incubus...
So, flexibility, ehn? ;D
<b>4. How do you feel today?</b>
Got Me Going by Ra
...
<b>5. What is your life’s purpose?</b>
I'm Not in Love by Enrique Iglesias and Kelis
To have a bunch of hot and dry one night stands and never fall in love? ...god, please no.
<b>6. What is your motto?</b>
La Tortura by Shakira and what's his name.
...*snicker*
<b>7. What do your friends think of you?</b>
Take Me Away by Ra
o.o; That's a bit ambiguous....
<b>8. What do you think of your parents?</b>
Stay With Me (Unlikely) by Celldweller
.....hahahahahahaha.... *sad laughter* (Also, I didn't think the Gypsy Song from the Queen of the Damned qualifies)
<b>9. What do you think about very often?</b>
You Learn by Alania Morissette
<b>10. What is 2 + 2?</b>
Counting Bodies Like Sheep by A Perfect Circle
XD
<b>11. What do you think of your best friend?</b>
Better Than Me: Hinder
...so creepily true... ;-;
<b>12. What do you think of the person you like?</b>
"Missing" by Evanescence
So true....
<b>13. What is your life story?</b>
Drag You Down - Finger 11
<b?15. What do you think of when you see the person you like?</b>
Panic Attack by Finger 11
*amused snicker*
<b?16. What will you dance to at your wedding?</b>
Washing Me Away In The Tides by Trivium
17. What will they play at your funeral?
Run It (Remix) by Chris Brown, Juelz Santana
O.O;;;;;;
18. What is your hobby/interest?
Bent by Matchbox 20
Tribal bellydance FTW!
19. What is your biggest fear?
Gatekeeper by Within Temptation
...?
20. What is your biggest secret?
So-So Suicide by Finger 11
:3 Mh-hm.
21. What do you think of your friends?
Superman by Ra
...unfortunately true...
22. What will you post this as?
Move Ya Body by NiNa Sky |
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Read 1 - Post |
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| I need. |
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| 02:18am 11/11/2007 |
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company today. I'm feeling down and buggered about things that I need to talk to someone about. Is the Binko and/or free after lunch with the parents? I just really need opinions and advice and an ear. I think you guys'll be able to best do said task.
Call me please. |
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| Dear Sperm Donor... |
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| 02:08pm 06/11/2007 |
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mood:  angry
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that I seem to be unable to get rid of,
There are things you need to tell me. Such as if I hadn't gotten a job this summer, I wouldn't have gotten an apartment. Such as if I didn't get my check change despite me telling that I had signed the papers for it, that I wouldn't be getting the apartment.
These are important things, quit telling my fucking mother, and tell me. I'm the one that needs to know. Not her.
Another you should have told me long ago: I will be disowned if I even date a black guy. That would have been nice to know before I flippin' grew up so tolerant. Chances are I'll probably end up with someone who isn't a redneck and goes out of their way to be an ass. Unlike my mother, I can do better than you.
Sincerely,
Nicole Ex-Griffith |
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Read 4 - Post |
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| Dear Dad. |
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| 10:55pm 03/11/2007 |
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mood:  annoyed
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You do not know more about computers than I do. If you did, you would at least know the differences between a Mac computer and a Windows OS computer and then understand why I can't put Microsoft Office 2007 on my MacBook.
Thank you and have a nice day,
Nicole
Your Daughter who was raised by a computer |
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| OMG~ |
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| 09:02pm 15/10/2007 |
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o.o Not only do they steal the costumes ( *snicker*), but I've just seen a holy cow, incredible Berber walk. Now, if I only I could steal his technique. >< It's Edyta's partner, a model boy. |
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| The last two days have been effing awesome. |
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| 12:34am 09/10/2007 |
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mood:  happy music: Fans...lots of fans.
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And the fact that I just found that Mark Cohen is my next door neighbor makes all the better and more humorous. *smile* I feel so much better, I'm just lacking the studio apartment... <.< That stays frigid almost all the time. It isn't cold enough yet.
Life is fabulous.
Went to Campestre tonight with a few friends (Lucy, Jacob, and Jessie to be exact). Two butterflies, an asexual, and a straight woman...we make quite the caravan let me tell you. Haido, Miguel, and the usual crew plus one new guy were working.
Haido...is very interesting. The last time I was there with Binko and her sister, he gave me what I like to call the "date shakedown". "Do you have a boyfriend/how old are you/where do you live/etcetera". I joked about it what the Binko and her sister.
But tonight, I took the two queens and Lucy with me. For as little time as I've known Jessie, we've become quite physical with each other. (His reactions amuse me, and I amuse him. So, it balances out...in some weird, twisted way.)
Haido came by and asked if Jessie was my boyfriend, and I told him no, he was my sister. (Now, keep in mind this is all in Spanish. So he's thinking at this point that I am goofing up on my endings). He laughed and walked away, and then circled back. At this point, Jessie was doing something annoyingly amusing, so I called him a "mariposo". >.> Translated literally, it means butterfly, however, it's often used to mean "fag" and various other gay insults that Americans are so free with.
I heard Haido laughing, and then it wasn't ten minutes later that he came back to the table again. And started asking me about the brother/sister thing again. And finally, I told him that Jessie liked men. Wow. That was an interesting moment, and then it was followed up by the obvious question. "Do you like women?" "NO! ME GUSTAN MUCHO LOS HOMBRES!"
And all this ended up with me giving him my phone number. Now, if he'll actually call back is completely in question. :3
But nonetheless, it's been a fabulous start to the week. |
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| Not now, God, please not now. |
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| 06:43pm 24/09/2007 |
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mood:  depressed
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Shannon....my dog and family is at the vet with kidney failure. The vet says he's going to try and pull her through. And he's given her two to three days.
I don't want her to go yet, not yet. I still need her. |
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| So, I have found the type of man... |
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| 09:56pm 23/09/2007 |
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music: So, You Think You Can Dance?
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....I should marry. A Latin dancer from Russia.... I wants me some Pasha...now damnit.
Oh. Mai. Gawd. Dah Hawtness. *pounce* ...However, I'm still wondering why they keep putting Cat n all these oogleh dresses.
Anyways, I'm taking a break from work. Been slaving nonstop on art homework. Admittedly it isn't due until Tuesday, but I know my luck. Something will come up that will keep me from getting it done.
My dog's been really sick. She hasn't eaten much since last Thursday, and the vet seems to think its the cold med she's been on. So, he gave another cold medicine and a stomach settler. Mom hasn't been giving her the cold medicine on top of the stomach settler apparently. By my opinion, that is a good thing.
My friend has invited me to a cosplay Halloween party on October 27. I probably won't be going to the Halloween Hafla in Charleston then. I've been meaning to get up to her place....but we all know how that's worked out so far. She's been up there two years and I have yet to go up. But I'm having issues finding a costume. -.-; Woo-hoo. Don't get me wrong. I like anime, I just haven't kept up with it as much as I should.
Once I started dancing, other things I enjoy faded into the background and became less important. Why spend money on comic books when I could get a coin belt for the price of three or four of them? I'd get more use out of the coin belt. But now, I'm stuck trying to figure out what to do...I'm thinking I have an idea, but I need to sketch it out.
And with that, I'm off for the night.
However, I'm feeling better now. :3
P.S. - Must remember to get my hands on Fuego: Pitbull. |
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| I think I figured it out... |
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| 11:13pm 16/09/2007 |
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mood:  contemplative music: Breathe: Melissa Etheridge
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So, I should be working on drawing homework right now, but I haven't felt up to much of anything this weekend. Barely managed to get what little bit of homework done that I did. I missed CultureFest ( *pout* ) 'cause I've been under the weather.
But, it took looking at PostSecret today to figure out what's partly wrong with me. I haven't had any "down time" to sit and just think, figure out things for myself...To spend time brooding over the wreck and what effects it's going to have on me.
Besides the horrific real time memories, it's been haunting me. I've been in other wrecks before (not of my own causing, wasn't old enough to drive). I kept thinking in my mind, it would have been so easy to die. I almost died...
When I get time to think, the phrase keeps replaying in my head: I almost died...I almost died...I almost died... I guess it's sufficient to say that I'm not ready to die; I'm 19. I realize that I'm going to go when I'm supposed or wanted to die. But I haven't been able to shake this sick feeling I have when I purposely relive the events. I don't like running away from things and pushing them to the back of my mind to forget them...never have.
But I was reading PostSecret's blog today, and I often amuse myself by thinking about what secrets I would send in. I thought about sending in a picture of the car with the words: "I walked away from this with barely any injuries. It's three weeks later, and I'm almost completely healed. It still scares me that I almost died a virgin." And then from that, everything started to settle in.
I figure out the thing that shakes my core the most. It freezes me from the inside out and twists my insides in tight, little circles.
It's not that I almost died. And it's certainly not that I almost died a virgin.
It's the idea that I almost died...alone... |
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twilight_crux's journal
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