Last nights dream was almost movie like. It was set in some suburb with manicured lawns. A place that looked like something out of Pleasantville or something like that. There was a man living there who reminds me of a Jim Carey Liminey snicket character. His wife had died and he wouldn’t move on from that. He grew nothing but prickly vines and bushes all over his yard to add to his suffering if he ever tried to leave the house. He decided to bring other people into his suffering and had a magic ticket …. That if you looked at it… you were brought into this strange fairy tale/horror town with him to suffer. Myself and some other person.. I guess it was supposed to be a brother of mine or something even though I don’t have one, happened to look at the ticket and we were sucked in. all I remember from being there was fighting with him and taunting him while going down his driveway trying to draw him out and off his land so that the spell would be broken and we could all leave the place.



I had lots of other strange dreams… spiders and spider webs all covering the garage door entrance. I had a dream that I was exhausted and trying to sleep in my boss’s garage while she was cutting another co-workers hair.

Another recurring theme in dreams is a house with lots and lots of rooms. I always roam through them trying to find the best room. Usually there is stuff left over from the previous tenants that I rummage through..like clothes or other personal belongings. It is always furnished. Last night I had this dream again however my parents were there and the house was also haunted. We went into one room and decided that it would be best for my granny since it still had a tv and other audio/visual equipment. In another room like a main room there was a huge flat panel tv on the wall that I saw a ghost of a young woman in. Another thing that is the same in all these houses are the bathrooms. They are all huge with a shower and a bathtub and a couple of toilets that are always filled literally with crap. In my dreams I can never find a clean toilet to use…ever. We made our way into the dinning area and started snooping but there were people in the kitchen cooking.. i believe they were the kitchen staff and we weren’t supposed to be in there… my parents were no longer in the dream at this point but some random people I didn’t recognize. We we all ran out of there… (this dinning room was huge I mean huge!!!!!!) we ran out and into some other area of this house that was like a big play room with a bowling ally and other games.

Another dream I had was I was by a body of water with my cat moxie. She tried to jump to another walkway on the water but missed and fell in the water and I pulled her out. Also by the water was this secret nuclear testing facility where there were of course evil scientists. Moxie however destroyed it all a saved the world and lost a leg in the process. What a great cat. lol

I had this dream last night hat ive had before... or at least parts of it. I was in this hotel room and next door was this guy holding friends hostage. Jen was in this dream with me.. i don't remember her being there before. We had a plan to try climb up through the ceiling and over into the next room to get our friends out while someone go the guys attention at the door. Jen was getting all greased up and loosening up the paint on this pillar in the room so she could squeeze up the pillar in between the wood and the paint... ( i dunno) and climb up into the ceiling. Other people had made their way up there and there was a stash of old candy up there. Skittles kitkats.. whatever.. but years old. In the corner of this crawl space there was a tunnel that lead down and into the next room...

thats about all i can remember.

a triumphant return!!! i know you missed me

im so sad..... i just dont want to do this anymore

Ive been very patient...but it seems as though you still have forgotten to send me my playstatin 2. Times are hard....though im sure you know...since you see all.... are you sure you're not god? But anyway... I need a distraction from the saddness.... Perhaps some games that I could blow stuff up or kill things...so that I dont have to do that for real..... Santa are you out there?

You have no power over me anymore. You will not beat me down anymore, whether it be physical, mental or emotional. Just to let you know from observation, that no one really likes you. Be the real you. The real you is a great guy...stop being this asshole to fit in to an image. Our time is done and it wasn't all bad. But never could I be myself with you.....Never could I let my gaurd down and relax. I hope for your sake...that everyone else is wrong...and that you do grow up and change for the better. But its not up to me to take care of you anymore, and to give you whatever you want or need. Our chapter is done. Its a new year.....Im back to being me.....and I have a lot of new chapters to write. Fate is leading me back on track.

The past 9 months I lived in hell. I wont go into the details because that's between me and the ex. I just don't know how to deprogrram myself....my thinking...my heart....

It's been a long long time since ive been on here. I know i'll be able to write soon.