It's funny how beautiful people look when they're walking out the door

Once again, I know that like 3 people on my friends list actually LIKE The Crow, but...my friend showed me this FMV the other night when we were drinking. It's to The Beginning is the End is the Beginning and it's SO FUCKING WELL MADE. Greg and I just sat there completely slack-jawed when it was over.



Almost cried when watching it again.

....I don't feel well...

So at one in the morning last night, I get a text from my mother telling me that she's throwing me out of the house, for neglecting to call her the night before when I stayed at Greg's. My phone died, mind, and I had no idea what the fuck her number was.

So I call her after I got that text, we fight, and my father is tired and just wants the psycho bitch to shut the fuck up, so he tells me not to come home. She PRETENDED TO BE MY FATHER and texted me saying that "u treat ur mother like shit u need 2 get ur shit together well get restrain order if u dont leave 2nite"

.....

Mind you, the cunt also tried to file a missing person's report on me, barely five hours before this.

So after the WORST night of my life (staying over boyfriend's best friend's house because I had nowhere to go, boyfriend's best friend telling me to cheat on Greg with him, me getting creeped out and not sleeping, really starting to think that I have no guy friends because it seems like they all want to get in my pants in situations like these) I come home to get my shit and she's crying. I get the "I LOVE YOU SOOO MUCH we didn't really WANT you to go, we JUST WANT you to FOLLOW THE RULES" speech, hem, BULL. SHIT.)

I just ignored her, and went to go look at the apartment I've been trying to get into for the past week or so. I met the landlord, signed the lease, worked out an agreement with him regarding paying the security deposit in incriments, bam, Ashe has her own place, finally, and is moving in on Wednesday. It's not glamourous by any stretch of the imagination, no kitchen or bathroom, but it'll definitely suffice. It's not TINY, like I have my own closet and there are HUGE windows so the room is really nicely lit. I'm wicked excited to move in. My landlord is really flexible with money...my friend from work who was kind enough to tell me about the opening was explaining to me about how she showed up WITH HER BAGS and he let her move in that night. So I'm good, I just really need to concentrate on packing and stuff for the next few days.

Greg promised me a nice day for just the two of us tomorrow, so I'm very excited about that. I expect next week will be very stressful for me, so if I turn into a dragon lady, I apologize in advance.

Cigarette. Now.

So tomorrow I'm going to St. Vincent's to look for shit for my photoshoot. To inject personality into it, I'm gonna dress up like a Noir film actress from the 1940s, 'cos I'm an actress and all that. Thank you very much Ms. Berman for entrancing me with these women, I think it's possible for me to emulate their style. I hope so, anyways.

Peggy Cummings:


And Joan Crawford, who starred in Mildred Pierce, a great Noir film.

Tomorrow commences the great weekend of romance. I have three days off...such is a vacation to me.
@_@

I just want it to be Friday. Greg and I both have it off and I don't have to go anywhere near that godforsaken restaurant for twenty-four hours. Know what we're going to do? Bang. That's right. All day. All over the house. And take breaks to indulge in the big bowl of sugar-dusted raspberries, blackberries, and strawberries that I plan on buying on Thursday. And angel food cake. Uh huh.

Yup, I'm not kidding. Ya'all can judge us if you want. We are literally devoting a whole afternoon to carnal pleasure and romantic intimacy, and I can't wait for it. Been so stressed lately with work, and with certain people choosing to run their mouths about shit. I'm tired of drama, this isn't high school anymore. So done with that bullshit. I have no qualms with writing off the people involved, either, as they clearly are eager to do the same for me. I kind of wish there was a way to salvage the friendships, but that obviously isn't happening, so fuck 'em.

I'm moving out soon, for *real* this time. I found a place that's where this girl I work with lives, and it's only $130 a week. Of course it's a shitty one bedroom apartment and the whole building shares a bathroom, but whatever, it'll be my own place and will help me get into the habit of saving my money. I'm meeting with the landlord on Thursday hopefully so I can start paying off my security deposit. Yeah.

Anyone wanna buy me a laptop? :-/

Errr yeah. I better get to bed. We didn't leave the store until 1AM because Chris wanted to pull a perfect close. I hate cleaning dividers...

Hood Anette.

Yo.

Leave me alone we didn't leave Friendly's until 1 in the morning.

Poll #1248580 Photoshoot
Open to: All, detailed results viewable to: All

Which sounds the best for a shoot?

Deb's gonna take the nudie shots, Lisa's gonna do the non-naked ones. It ought to be good. xD

Ahhh I so don't wanna close tonight...

So my graphics community, redcarpet_grave has been around for about two years now and I have EIGHT members.

Would anyone like to affiliate with me?

James approaching Maria's corpse on the cot in the jail cell=symbolism relevant to Mary's illness/her sick/deathbed.

How could I have NOT noticed this before?

Ladies, have any of you tried the film before?

Effective? Yes? No?

I had an awful nightmare last night.

I dreamt that I was the Joker's girlfriend.

It was so scary. Not even kidding either.

Here's a Chobits AMV to The Internet is for Porn.

New nipple rings, guys!

Ooooh man they look SO cute. I love my boobs so much right now, even if I was cursing their existence earlier yet again because I couldn't find a bra that fits at VS.

I have little plastic, semi-transparent red hoops in them now and they look adorable. Super adorable, Greg will be thrilled.

Amazing storm.

Time for Ashe to hem..."crawl into bed".

Today was wonderful.

Greg and I hung out with Deb to celebrate her birthday. I made her a Gir cake, which she loved (picture later) and we went to eat at Friendly's. Deb was pleased by the birthday song xD. Instead of going to Club Hell, we went to the movies and I saw The Dark Knight again.

Some things I picked up about the Joker second time around:

• Not only does he have the tick with flicking his tongue against his lips like a snake, he also has this thing with his speech where he emphasizes ONE WORD over and over again (in one monologue with Batman in the jail cell it's "people", with Harvey in the hospital room it's "plan") and then when one expects him to finish his sentence with that particular word, he goes and changes it at the last second. I think it's a clever means of gathering one's attention. People expect him to keep using that word, and therefore pay rapt attention to what he's saying, no matter how insane. At the very last second he changes it to something else, so you hang on to his every word waiting for what's next.
  
• The only thing that truly bothers him is being referred to as insane, or a monster. "Freak" doesn't really cut it, but insane and monster do. True mark of a sociopath.
  

I still believe in Harvey Dent.

Anyways, on the way home Greg and I were getting kind of frisky. Just laughing and tickling and groping around, harmless sexual banter, and all of a sudden he takes on this really firm voice and goes "I'm not feeling it, hon, stop."

I was really miffed and offended. After that he started acting really bug-eyed and paranoid, and when I asked what was wrong he just looked away and said "I'm tired." The kiss goodnight was really short, too. *sigh*

Of course my initial reaction to this was that he was feeling guilty for one reason or another, but then I remembered that Greg is Greg and really bipolar about sex sometimes. No problem. But then I started thinking about shit.

It's so fucking difficult and tiring for me to try and peruse the depths of his mind sometimes. It's emotionally draining, for fuck's sake! I know he's a locked box, I know he has a million walls up around him and I'm steadily making it through, but I just DON'T GET HIM sometimes and it's fucking frustrating as hell.

*sigh*

I have to be patient. I love him very, very much, I really do.

It just scares me that when I look into his eyes sometimes, what I see is a frightened animal. A frightened animal who wants badly to return the affection it is shown, but is too afraid, embittered, and downtrodden to accept the fact that it is not being deceived.

Patience is the key because I know that he doesn't want to lose me, I know that he knows that I'm the only girl who has loved him this unconditionally. He realizes that and it scares the hell out of him. Am I brazen to think that I'm the second girl that he's ever really loved? No, I don't think so...he basically told me himself. I know, damn it, because he literally shuts down if I say or do something even sligtly similiar to the other one's mannerisms, even if my behaviour is totally in jest.

He's afraid to open up completely because of that FUCKING cunt Jen. I have never wanted to destroy a human being as much as I want to destroy her, because god damn it, she broke him. I hate her for it.

I wish she would hate herself, too. It's the worst thing you can wish on someone, in my eyes.

We've faced some turbulence lately, but Deb has been such a great help to me because she's known him longer. I can't even...begin to express how she made me feel when she told me that he was the happiest she'd ever seen him, with me, and that is getting me through times like this when I just sit here, and clench my fists, and just want that girl to fucking DIE, the hypocritical, machiavellian, gold-digging, manipulative fucking cunt. I hate her. I want her to burn for making him this way.

Anyways, Joker cosplay, I help Deb with...that's something to definitely look forward to at least.

( As promised, why I hate Ophelia )

And that's all, in a nutshell, shazam with the pun xD

Greg showed me Boogiepop Phantom. So many people have recommended it to me, but...I hated it. It's hard to follow. It's slow. I don't understand it (maybe I'm stupid) and the art isn't all that impressive, either. :-/ I sat there thinking "Huh?" the whole time, and also, that BELL *grits her teeth* Annoying.

I wasn't really paying attention, either, because he kept undressing me/giving me hickeys xDD

( So we had sex for like three hours instead. )

We had a nice dinner at South Garden afterwards. I said "Good night, sweet prince, may flights of angels sing thee to thy rest" as a parting shot, and he smiled a lot and blushed really hard. I explained to him what the context was when Horatio says that in Hamlet and he was really miffed because he didn't realize that it was related to death. (but I'm convincing him to read the comic version of the play, since he now knows about the incest controversy of the era/Ophelia's madness/circumstances of the Prince's demise and he was really interested. Word.)

Also, everyone, my boyfriend is a pretty DAMN good artist. O_O Saw his old art portfolio and I was like "Damn." WAY better than me.

So tomorrow night we're celebrating Deb's birthday by going to Club Hell and I've never been clubbing before, ever. Nervous. O_O Should be a good time, though.

WATCHMEN, MOTHERFUCKERS.

Just a friendly reminder:

• Comment if you snag something, please!
  
• Credit redcarpet_grave
  
• Enjoy!
  

ONWARD!

You do not.

DO NOT.

Berate me for sleeping late into the afternoon when I work night shifts at Friendly's. Not all of us have a set schedule every day like how you do, and must wake at 5AM every morning.

"Meeeeigh, you've been SLEEPING? It's kind of LATE, don't you think?"

No, you ASS!

-.-;

And when I say the only day I *can't* work this week is today...I MEAN THAT THE ONLY FUCKING DAY THAT I CAN'T WORK IS TODAY.

Don't call me and ask me to come in at 2:30!!! -____-

I'll go into detail as to why I hate Ophelia later. I'm sure that sas26, zhalin, and jenkc already know, but according to my last LJ post, not everyone does. *blink* How shocking, I thought I ranted about that enough.

This is good. Very, very good.

In SH fanics, drug addled social misfits are ten a penny so it's a real testament to your writing that you've made me care about Lucian.

Your imagery is nice and immersive, even poetic in places. The dialogue fits well too. WHile naturalistic it's slightly stilted in a way that suits the SH world perfectly.

I do hope you'll update shortly. Keep up the good work!!

-Review for Drain Away. Yay ^_^ That made me feel good.

So guess what I picked up at Barnes and Noble today, hmm?

Guess. Guess.

Hamlet. Hamlet the fucking GRAPHIC NOVEL.

Yup.

It's amazing.

I read it throughout my whole shift at work tonight (and still managed to rack in $50 on a three hour shift, shazam) Haven't finished yet, but I'm glued to it. It's SO FUCKING GOOD, even though it's supposed to be a supplement for the actual play, like people who have a hard time understanding Shakesperean literature. The art is b-e-aOOTiful, too (especially the rendition of Ophelia, even though I hate Ophelia. The artist made her pretty, but not breathtakingly beautiful, more like "mousey", it's perfect.)

She also has this fabulous method of portraying the character's emotions through the panels. I don't know how to explain it. It's kind of cartoony...like in the panel where Hamlet is describing life as a rank, corrupt garden that chokes the good out, it shows him completely incarcerated by vines. Also, Hamlet's pretty spot-on to my own personal mental image, even though he slightly resembles Severus Snape in some panels 0.o

Her style also really reminds me of Johnen Velasquez. (the guy who created Johnny the Homicidal Maniac and Invader Zim, for those who don't know.)

I think that I found another book that is going to be on my person at all times. ^_^

I wish Angela Orosco wore different clothes, I really do.

One of my favourite characters in Silent Hill...does she have to be so frumpy and plain? Yeah, that sweater's pretty tight, but the fact that she wears a fucking white turtleneck and RUST-COLOURED PANTS (fashion sense? fail?)...

I could therefore never cosplay her. No one would recognize me and I'd hate the costume so much that I just wouldn't try xD

Yeah, I'm making another Silent Hill AMV and am watching the clips, so sue me xD

Written note I recieved from two extremely hot, hippie/indie-looking chicks who I waitressed tonight:


YOU ARE SWEETER THAN MY ICE CREAM!!!

:)

Thanks so much!

Come visit us at
Women of Wisdom
(118 Washington St. blah blah)

Love,
Heather+K.C


And with that?

Ten dollar tip on like a thirteen dollar bill.

Fucking bam.

Also got four $7 tips from four different tables, and one table told the manager that I improved their impression of Friendly's. Also added that I am a very "professional" waitress, and that I was the best server they'd had in awhile xD

In other news, Ashe had a great night at work, racked in $60 on a MONDAY NIGHT when she probably had 20 tables tops it was so slow, and only worked 5-11 with absolutely NO people coming in between about 9:45-11.

Ladies and gentlemen, I'm back in the biz. Scoooore xDDDD