We'll be looking back on everything

What the hell am I doing?
What the hell am I doing this for?

 

What about old magazines that you tried to collect but just got tired of collecting and don't have room for it in your room or house anymore?

  GO GREEN CAMPAIGN Organizing Committee President

Thanks to everyone who was concerned and prayed for my Lola Conching. I spent the whole day with her today at the hospital and she's recovering fast. She can now speak some full sentences and can mover her body around. She still doesn't like the tubes of course but now she can drink with a straw and eat mashed foods, which I fed her today because I'm an expert masher. ^_^

I just really hope she can get out of the hospital soon and she can go back to her hobbies. Ang kulit kulit nya sa kama e!

 Lola Conching working her charm on Cute PT. ^_^

 

Please continue to pray for her.

Thank you.

:)

an emotional wreck in denial.

***

There's just a lot of things going on this week and eventually

I'm gonna lose...

losing.. losing.. losing...  

I lost it.

Blah. Way to go with the Chickenjoy rip-off. *slap*

 

Gawd. GAWD. God... I need some form of release. I want to drink and not vomit (because that's not exactly the kind of release I'm getting at). Cry. I already did, but it felt too pathetic.. at least for myself, so hopefully not for someone out there who cares *whimper* And if all else fails, I'll do my old-time favorite and ultimate escapist move of .... *drumroll!* the vanishing act! (never happened. not good with magic and spells, and never ever at saying "no"). But oh! I could really really really use that right now.

***

Summary of the jibberish: I feel sad and I'm not doing anything about it.

 

Hmmm. But I have faith in me.

I'll snap out of it...

snapping.. snapping.. snapping..

snapped NOT.

 

 

:(

Girls? anyone? up for a drink?

I'll be out this weekend... so Monday night?

Pray.

Pray for my Lola Conching.

Lola Conching is the strongest 82 year old ever. She can go up 5 flights of stairs just to garden. She can strut in a ballroom like a dancing queen... Dancing as if she was seventeen. She cooks the bestest pinakbet in the whole wide gulay world. She raised 15 kids almost on her own. She likes hot pink. She has a sharp tongue. She never fails to give me a Christmas gift, wrapped with a hand written card ,even when I'm too old for it.

 

She's now at the ICU. Had a stroke yesterday, rushed to a hospital which made her wait for 2 FRIGGING hours and transferred to 3 after that the very SAME DAY. Her left arm is paralyzed. Her speech slurred. Her other arm restrained because she pulled out the tubes that wer hurting her throat. It's her first time on a hospital bed without having to be in labor. It's her first time to feel this kind of pain and helplessness. 

 

Still, she's the strongest 82 year old ever. But she has to be stronger this time.

 

Pray for my lola.. Pray for my lola please... Please... please...

 

 

She's the str

Gossip Gay

If Gossip Girl were gay, he would surely be Brian Gorrell (minus the angst and oh yeah, anonymity). He's this Australian blogger featured on the news a few weeks ago whose profession as of the moment is to wreak havoc on the lives of those who ruined his. I can't help it that I find this grave defamation to the so-called Gucci Gang's (this is so damn catchy!) character extremely entertaining. So much, that it distracts me from reading worthwhile stuff like Jose Rizal's life for my PI class! Haha. It's probably the way he writes it. He's bordering to the gay version of Jun Lozada na! Hah. But if there's one thing he said that I believe is true, it's this:

"I was so stupid."

Now, he blames love for this. You were just too late, mate.

***

Manila, Manila!

Kinaumagahan pa lang, nakatanggap ako ng tawag mula sa Koreyano kong propesor, na wala pa sa isang buwang pananatili sa Pilipinas ay nanakawan na ng wallet sa dyip. Ano nga ba namang klaseng pagbati iyon sa isang dayuhang bisita? Ganyan lang talaga ang minamalas. Ganyan din naman ang gawain ng gutom na sikmura. Sa kanyang tawag, sinabi niya sa akin na nais niyang makapag-liwaliw sa Maynila. Sabado nga naman daw ngayon at ayaw nilang mabulok sa munti nilang hawla sa Hardin ng mga Rosas.

Hindi ko rin naman kinayang tumanggi kahit sinubukan. Ako na walang kaalam-alam sa direksyon, ay hahayaang mag-isa na ilibot ang mga kapwa kong lalong walang kaalam-alam. Kaya't inisip ko na lang... "Adbentyur, ito!". At naging ganoon nga ang aming kapalaran. Ako na musmos lamang sa kanyang huling bisita sa Maynila, ay sa araw na ito ay biglaang tour guide... at tourista!

Matagal ko rin namang inaasam na makabalik sa Maynila. Narinig ko kasi ang kahanga-hangang tours na sinasagawa ni Ginoong Celdran at napaisip akong, di ko pa talaga gamay ang lugar na dapat alam na alam ko tulad ng likod ng aking palad.

At ayon, nagsipag ikot kami sa Intramuros, Fort Santiago, at Pambansang Museo ng Pilipinas. Nakakalungkot ang Pambansang Museo. Gumanda nga ang panlabas, ngunit kulang na kulang sa looban. Tuwang-tuwa naman ako sa Fort Santiago. Swak na swak sa PI class ko. Kumuha na ko ng maraming litrato, pati na isa na kasama si Rizal. Matuwa pa si Ginoong Ocampo sa akin at maisipang bigyan ako ng uno! Haha. Asa.

Nakakatuwa siyang guro. Sabi ni Rj, di siya magtataka kung naka-hithit ito bago magsimula ang klase. Pero hanga din naman ako sa kanya. Di ko kasi maisip ang isang tao na halos inalay na ang buong sarili sa pag-aaral kay Rizal. At ayon ang rason kung bakit di ko siya mabobola sa bukrebyu niya. Aba! Inatasan ba naman kaming i-rebyu ang sariling libro niya! Hanep! Walang-wala na dito ang galing ko sa pambobola. Haha. Biro lang.

Sa kabuuan, naging masaya ang aking tour at masayang akong natuwa ang aking mga bisita. Minsan, napapansin kong nakikikinig pa ang ibang bisita sa aking mga sabi-sabi. Lahat naman nabasa ko sa libro ng PI 100, kaya siguro kapanipaniwala naman. Sa susunod na linggo naman, maghahanap kami ng librong biograpikal tungkol sa kanya.

Ayun nga lang.. Sa kasamaang palad, umitim na naman ako. Haha. Pero itago niyo sa bato, at babalik akong muli. Dahil narin kapos sa oras, di ko nagawa ang pinaka-gusto kong gawin. Ang magpalitrato sa Monumento niya. Sa muli nating pagkikita Gat!

***

Ang init init init init init init init sa Pilipinas.

 

 

 

 

I am officially enrolled. Yay! It's summer class for me again! Since I'll be delayed for a year (only because I'm too lazy to have my Korean subjects credited, and because most likely they won't be credited in the first place), I've programmed myself to graduate March 2009 with the goal of leaving my last semester with only thesis work and a single subject.

This summer I'm so happy (and damn lucky) to be taking the elusive of the elusive subjects! MST and PI 100! *clap,clap* Sows, natakot pa ko sa real time enlistment, sweswertehin lang pala ako. It was actually cool doing it... And even cooler when refreshing a page after finding out that all PI subjects were closed, there appeared the glorious word "ENLIST" beside the PI section of my choice. God must love me. He really must.

As a bonus, I'm classmates with RJ Pantua... in a FILIPINO CLASS. Believe it or not, it was only during our second day when I finally heard him say a phrase in Tagalog for all the 7 years I've known of his existence. He hasn't actually spoken it with me... But he speaks it alright. Hahaha.

***

I just realized, that in my four years in UP, I never had a summer vacation. Sad, but true. I'm a masochist like that. Well, for two years, I only took classes so I could work for FOPC. Those were the days when I eat, sleep, breathe and dream RECYCLABLES (basura) for the love of UP KMS. It was when I literally poured in blood, sweat and tears (and everything else beyond this cliche). This year, I think they have it easy. But I really don't mind being in the sacrificial lamb generation when it would lead to a change like this. *clap,clap*

***

I had my first GA with them at the tambayan and I only knew about 4/12ish people who were there. Excluding Arjay, who was kind enough to stay with me, was already a candidate for graduation. As expected, I was the only one from my batch. The kiddies were already being called Ate. Then, I had my moment with them sharing KMS history! Gawd, I felt so old! But... It felt good. It felt good to be back.

***

It's embarrassing for me to admit this, but I still get lost around UP. It's not because I've been gone for a long time, but its as simple as -- I suck with directions. It should explain why I don't drive until now. And even if public transportation was meant to make life easy,  I still take the wrong jeepney rides to get to where I want to be. And now that they've turned the Acad Oval into a one-way car scheme to give room for a BIKE LANE that I don't see a lot of people actually use especially under thia burning heat, I'm once again endangered to be lost. Kaya tawang-tawa na lang ako sa sarili ko when I had to take a cab with a stranger going to the Math Building just so I won't get late after half an hour of being lost. Daig ko pa Freshie mehn!

***

Check out the movie ASYLUM. But I'm warning you.... Teehee. :)

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

.

Moveover Aga! Grabe grabe grabe. Ang gwapo ni Gabby Concepcion.



Kung pedophile ang tawag sa mahilig sa bata, ano naman tawag sa may mga edad na? Hahaha. I don't know why, but I'm glad you're back. Pero haha, masyado mo atang tinake-advantage ang pagka-gwapo mo! 4 children from 4 different women... Aba, namudmud ka ng genes!

***

These days, I'm assisting Prof. Ahn while he adjusts to life in the Philippines. My latest visit with him was certainly memorable. I know he understands that we're a developing country and he would have to say goodbye to the comforts of Korea. He should be able to cope but it won't be easy. For starters, the weather would just drive him mad! Then, there's traffic, tardiness, pollution, etc.

They moved in to a smaller but better place in Hardin ng Rosas. It was a good thing that I was there because when they were about to settle the payments, the landlady just went into a complete silence as she counted the last bill. Her eyes began to widen, then suddenly her head was throbbing. It was like she was being possessed by an evil spirit! Exorcist scene talaga!

We all thought that the money was not enough or that she felt she was being scammed! The Koreans then thought that it was something cultural. They were apologizing for the way they gave her the money, counted the money, or the way they talked to her.

I rushed by her side and noticed she was shaking, but with the same possessed expression. I was really scared because I thought she'd turn lunatic and explode in a minute. I talked to her and held her hand, but she wasn't responding. It was about 3 minutes when she was like that... Then...

SNAP.

She was her old normal self in an instant. She only said, "Nagpalpitate kasi ako." And that was the last of it. She didn't even say sorry for worrying us, nor did she explain what her true condition was. It was as if nothing happened.

SCARY mehn!!!

***

Then we went shopping at SM for groceries. Prof. Ahn is just so adorable. While pushing the cart around, he begins to small-talk about globalization in supermarkets. Haha!

***

On the way home, we rode a taxi and I dropped them off to the apartment. The meter read 92.50. My professor gave the cab driver a 100 pesos. Then he gave me another 100 to bring the cab to my home.

But I just couldn't...


TD: Mga Koreano ba yun?

Me: Oo. Professor ko po nung nasa Korea ako.

TD: Hay nako, ang babarat ng mga yan. Di ko nga sana isasakay yung mga yun kung di lang sa iyo e.

Me: Ah bakit po? Ano po ba ginagawa nila?

TD: Ah basta, ang bagal magsipag-bayad. Binibilang pa talaga pera, para sakto sa metro. Hindi na lang mag-bigay. Ang yayaman naman nila hindi nalang mag-bigay. (EH KUYA DI BA DAPAT NAMAN TALAGA KUNG ANO YUNG SA METRO YUNG BINABAYARAN? TSKA HINDI NA DAPAT GAGALAW PA YUNG METRO KUNG NAKATIGIL NA KAYO SA DESTINASYON NIYO DIBA?! TSKA HINDI NAMAN PO SIGURO SILA MAGIINGAT AT SUSUNOD SA METRO KUNG DI SANA NILA NARIRINIG O NARANASAN YUNG MGA PANGLOLOKO NIYO SA MGA KATULDA NILA)

Me: Ah ganun po ba. (NAGTITIMPI NG GALIT) Pero kuya, alam niyo po mga taxi driver sa korea NAGBIBIGAY NG SUKLI. AS IN MISMO SENTIMO BINIBIGAY PO NILA. (SIGE NGA? NAGBIBIGAY BA KAYO NG SUKLI TULAD NIL:A? KUNG YUNG METRO NIYO PUMAPATAK NG BARYA, SANA MAY BARYA DIN NAMAN KAYONG PANUKLI. LAHAT NAMAN TAYO NAGBIBIGAY IMPORTANSYA DIN SA BARYA NA YUN)

TD: (ANO?! HINDI KA NAKAIMIK) Basta, mga barat sila. San ka ba nakatira?

Me: Sa Teacher's Village po.

TD: Sos, tapos hinatid mo pa yang mga barat na yan. (BARAT KA PA E! BINIGYAN KA NA NGA NG 100 PESOS E. KUMITA KA NA NGA E.)

Me: Okay lang po yun. Sila naman po nag-alaga sa akin nung andun ako sa Korea. (RAAAWRRRR). Sige Kuya, Dyan na lang ako sa labas, sakay na lang ako ng jeep. (RAWRRRR!)


Hay basta. Nakakaasar talaga.

I missed you so much. It feels good posting on you again. Probably you've been feeling jealous 'cause of all the cross-posting I do on Multiply... Not this time baby. It's just you tonight, only you.

Uhm. Alright.. I got a little carried away.

Anyway, it's one of those rare moments when I can actually go online and make a real journal entry, and not those like you're broadcasting news, when you think everybody cares what you do, when you do them or who you do them with. This one's just... sudden. Heck, I just feet like it!

Errr.. So... Yeah.

Right now I'm hating myself that I don't do much trying to keep in touch with my friends in Korea and my ASEAN friends too. It's the third month after all.. and I already feel the tears waiting for  their debut. I'll probably just sob one day  with all my junk and treasures from Korea that I plan to scrapbook before school starts. And that day is nearing.

***

I'm gonna be a school girl again! Oh yeah! Oh yeah.. A school girl like on her first day. No friends. :(  Ang friend-friend ko lang sa UP si Marlowe. Who doubles as the boyfriend too so that's great, right?  And of course, the juniors from my department and orgmates na feel ko dapat ko pang i-friend muli. Oh and my lucky friends-in-the-making! Magkakakilala din tayo!

I'm just scared out of my pants because I didn't get any units for Summer so then I have to go through Real-time enlistment. RAWR. I need this. I really need this. PI. PI .PI .PI .PLISSS!

I've also given up on having my classes credited. Hindi talaga swack e. Kasi naman, the classes I intended to get credited talaga... Hindi tinuro! But even if that's the case.. I wouldn't say my time there was a waste. At least, I got to learn things that UP couldn't offer me which makes me studying elsewhere more beneficial talaga. But I think my Korean Language units would have some use! Baka mawala 2.25 ko sa Spanish if ipapalit ko yung Korean ko. *eureka moment!*

***

I just have to shake off this office-personality I have now before I dive into the academe again. But truthfully, the whole intern experience was really good for me. I'm starting to discover my business sense, learned a lot about human resource organization (which is one of my career tracks), pleasing my parents and knowing them as individuals, money matters and becoming more considerate now when I ask for money, realities of life and all that jazz.

Since, kami namang mga anak mag-mamana ng mga ganito pati ang kasamang sakit na ulo, mabuting maaga ko nang nalaman. Pero, baka ngayon, yayaman na kami! Joke.

***


***

This could probably be the first post-LDR week  that I didn't see you for a whole... week! Well, I should be congratulating myself. You're bombarded with exams and the least I can do is not to distract you. But I'm in love with you so I can't help myself sometimes. Hah! Anyway, you know what I'm gonna say. You know I love saying it to you everyday. Gush gush gush. Friday, please come soooon!

***

I'm a mosquito magnet lately. Gumagana ba talaga ang OFF? How do I get rid of mosquito bites? I'm itchy and scratchy and I'm getting really pissed.

***

Ang daming nangyayari sa mundo. Pero feeling ko nawawala na naman ako. I'm here now, am I? Nag-Tritrinoma na ko so dapat IN na ko.

I would like to suggest to everyone a recent hobby of mine. Screenplay or Script reading. It all started one boring day at my internship when I decided to read scripts of movies I was too lazy to download. Basta ewan ko ba, I just have this issue with downloading. I'm not a very patient person when it comes to that.

The screenplay is the written conceptual skeleton of a movie. It's the lure that you have for directors, producers and actors to go in and make that jump into actually doing it. You know when those big stars say how great they thought the script was and that's when they decided to make it? So, it's really only now that I understand the value those strikers have in the movie industry.

So for some it's kinda weird but I realized how fun it was because I sustain a more retentive memory of movie lines and those great dialogues. I like how my mind creates the scenes in my head becoming into a blockbuster for my brain. There'd be no need for rewinding or subtitles even when they come in handy. Well, it surely is just a part of a whole and screenplays won't definitely give you the sit-back-relax viewing pleasure, but I think you can still eat yummy popcorn while doing it. Hah.

And if you notice, a lot of movies now are just adaptations from books. If you're too lazy or broke to read the novel, or not too thrilled to watch the movie either, then reading the screenplay would be the perfect choice. And c'mon.. You don't wanna buy those books with the movie poster on it right? There's just something so wrong with that for me. The raw, Courier-font type written material on white surface is just more like it. Plus, it's all ready for you in a few clicks.

Google!

I like lyrics, so I guess it follows I like scripts too. Haha.

***

I woke up at 7am today to catch the Oscars. It just brought me back to the those days when I was a clueless girl who just wanted to see those pretty people in gowns walking down the red carpet. Too bad the coverage Velvet featured was soooo lame. And I don't know if it's just me, but the attendance wasn't so star-studded, and to think they we're celebrating the big 80. The dresses pretty much were lame too.

Then, I guess, because of the writer's strike, the show turned out to be really simple. As simple as getting a bunch of clips and putting them together. Then, having Jon Stewart host the show was supposed to be the big save. Well, he was alright. He just appeared more of a stand-up comedian than a host really. No Oscar edge.

Anyway, It got me totally curious about the movie "There Will Be Blood" because it's starring my favorite actor as of the moment, named Best Actor in a lead role, Daniel Day-Lewis! Move over, Johnny Depp! (He's like the British version for me). And also, I'm so happy for Marion Cotillard. Just watching that mini-clip from "La Vie En Rose" got me instantly convinced that she deserves it.

I think the best acceptance speech would have to go to Best Supporting Actress Tilda Swinton. The words were witty and far from sappy but it gave me a heart-warming feel. I just couldn't get her at the red carpet. She had this barbaric-freakshow stature to her. And damn, to put on a dress like you got it from a carpeted hotel floor... Phew, I'm glad you won! But I must admit, after she won, I was a little more accepting of the dress. It's probably the heightened star status she has now.



Itchy to watch There Will Be Blood now!

***

Paging Amanda Angeles. Paging Amanda Angeles. Teeheehee. ^_^

I almost believed Perez' claim that he's dead. But I guess it's gonna be hard to kill a man who proves that he's still alive and promotes the Adidas track suit line while he's at it. And it would surely be harder to kill a man that the US has still failed to kill. And if you think you've gotten rid of him because he died, It's just gonna be even harder to kill him when his dead. His legacy will just live on and T-shirts with his face on would outsell Che Guevarra's.



***

I will not call myself fat ever again. Thanks to a B-rated HBO late night movie. Did you watch it last night?




***

What to do, what to do. I really need to get to school and fix my papers now. I'm so afraid I'm getting used to the bum's life I'll just wake up and decide to drop out. Waaaah. If I'm gonna face the likes of Rubio next semester I better read up now SHEENA, notes mo bibilhin ko na talaga! 

I have this candid way of talking about breasts anytime and anywhere. I suppose that this preferred subject gives me something in common with men. I won't be their preferred "object", but I can bear such talks. I get the flatty patty jokes goin 'round the clock, but fortunately, there's just been one male who ever picked on me because of it. Uh-huh, I get the dirt from my homies.

I already thought about getting implants. I'm not after the gigantic jugs or any amount of silicon doze to make me look like a porn star. I think my weight gain did me a favor in that area and many other parts a little. So right now, I'm not complaining.

But if there was an icon or saint for flat-chested girls, I'd canonize Kate Hudson.


Thanks, girlfriend. ^^

But my best breasted celebrity would have to be Shakira. For best breast screen exposure, that'll have to go to Caurice van Houten of "The Black Book". You go see for yourselves. Haha.

Then, we have the bra. That piece of garment which covers all the glory. A good bra that fits you well gives you a sensation of confidence and sexiness like no other. There's no one bra for every girl. It really... depends. But finding that good bra is like finding your soulmate. It gives you the peace of mind and comfort that you need.

I never really knew how I would be without it until I tried. Not that I'm a fan of Regine Velasquez' nipple bearing stunts, since it all happened because of ignorance or was it forgetfulness. Hahahaha. I was worried for a while, but it just felt so carefree afterwards. And I don't know if I should be bothered that nobody really noticed... Hmmm. Haha, does it matter? Anyway, that's one wardrobe malfunction I'm proud of.

***

But there are just some things that I say out in the open that I should probably be a little careful of. Just looking back on it, I want to slap myself across the face, pinch myself on the ear, and drag myself away. Physically impossible, but a good actress could pull it off. I don't know what made myself think in the first place that I'm surrounded by deaf people and those words I belted out wouldn't catch attention. Pooft. Erase. Erase. Erase.



There are just some things better left unsaid.



There are things you always forget to say.


But, saying things aren't enough.


Then again, sometimes it is... because you just have to say it.


What I'm saying is... mean what you say.



But, that'll kill poetry... and these scandals all together.



I should be complaining that it's useless now to turn on the TV since  some cable men went to our house. They installed these digital boxes required for our cable connection. You probably have it too. Was it TIVO? Asaaaaa. If it was, then I could've watched that 7 hour hearing on Senate.

I didn't know what to call it at first but it does the most retarded thing to our TV sets. Well whichever the box is connected, basically controls all programs watched by the other TV sets where the former cable extension was installed. Rawr.

Google then told me that by year 2009, all major TV networks would switch to Digital Broadcasting and those retro antenna TV sets would catch ziltch. American studies showed that minorities would be the most affected by this change. A digital box in the Philippines would cost about 1,000 pesos.

How about OUR minorities?

A fascinating observation would be that a Filipino household, kesa sa baryo o sa squatter area, merong TV set. But I don't think they can afford to buy those digital boxes. Wowowee or Bigas? Bigas!

Pero dahil bilib ako sa galing ng Pinoy, mapipirate at maiimitate din yan. Hahaha.

I've been bitching for a while how our internet connection is just getting worse and worse. It always gets disconnected and soooobrang bagal.



Just my twisted theory of conspiracy. Hahaha. But c'moooon.. No to sabotage!

This page in my handbook said that there were 7 phases of culture shock. The first 6 were understandable and were exactly the things I expected, cushioning much of the "shock" when I came to Korea. But the last one struck me. It said about the shock I'll get when I come home. Come on, gimme a break.

Those bombings and political scandals were already things that weren't new to me (but still depresses me somehow) and I surprisingly missed on my daily news back there. My ASEAN friends over were even worried about me coming back to a nation of those conditions when I was already conditioned to a carefree life in Korea where fistfights in the congress were not as threatening compared to bombs going off and killing them. I understand their concerns, it was sweet. But here I am, worshipping the Philippine soil I lived on for 20 years and a month of my life. I'm so back, and so damn happy to be. Coming home ultimately meant retreating back to my comfort zones, but number 7 was telling me that I'm still under the threat of "shock".

Oh and shock it was.

My family would joke about how much things at home went into a series of telenovela twists since I was gone and I'd joke back how sad I felt not being casted, I do make a good contrabida. Kilay pa lang eh. Haha. With the doze of drama those events had on them, I can already see ourselves as the next big thing on primetime that would shoot up ABS-CBN's ratings up again to end the network rivalry. As much as we would look good on TV, this was definitely one of the most testing times in our family's history that would just be too good for TV. Oh, but just like good 'ole Filipino folks, we always find the courage to laugh and enjoy in the midst of our problems. Some would say it's good 'ole stubborness too, but that's just coping for us. Things won't probably get any lighter this 2008, but we've got each other's back. Besides, life's more exciting like this. Eversince putting "boring" next to "failure" in my list of fears, I'm always looking room for excitement. In the Tanya-sense of things, good 'ole clean fun. *winkwink*

***

I just realized that I didn't finish my countdown. I guess life in the Philippines just swept me back in. At first, I was concerned that when I get home, I'd be speaking in repetitive sentences beginning in "Sa Korea.. ["In Korea"], or ending in "since I came back." that would just make my story-telling too self-absorbed with my experience there. I'll try not to, but sometimes it can't be helped. People tell me that it's as if I never left at all, but 10 months is never too short of a life to live. I wasn't just in Korea. I lived a part of my life there and I know I'm not the same Tanya as before. It shouldn't be any different from a life-changing weekend in Boracay when I was 10 seeing naked Caucasian women for the first time. Meaning, It'll be in my memory forever ... and you'll hear me saying the same stories in dinner conversations until I gain a more accepting audience made up of my children and my children's children. Hah!

***

I also have this phenomenon of 3's. I seem to have a delayed reaction on things that comes in a gap of 3. There's that three days before I told my mom I had menstruation, the three weeks I didn't get caught for having no ID in Miriam. and the three months it took me to cry over a broken heart. Then, the three months after that when I realized how foolish it was. It only took me three months before I got homesick in Korea, and about the same time remaining  on my stay to finally like Kimchi. Now, I think it'll take me as much time before I resurface back to my ASEAN friends.

Unlike them, I feel I'm the person least adapted to Korean life. As of this writing, I only have less than 10 Korean songs in my laptop. I've only watched one complete Koreanovela and I can't name you a Korean TV star even if you showed me a picture. And, I can only cook you a Korean dish if it meant rameon coming out of a plastic package or something microwaveable, something I just recently proved to my friends. Unlike them, in emails I wouldn't drop the "missing this and that" too often, too soon. Thing is, the Philippines is just too Koreanized as of the moment... Things are just too hard to miss! I see Korean chinky's everytime I walk out. There's 3 or 4 Korean restaurants I can walk to and a nearby Korean store that zapped me right back to Korea the moment I walked in. Korea's all right here where people can easily say it's an invasion.

So hyeah, give me three months then I'll be missing Korea like crazy.





***


So it's weird for me now when people say I look Korean. I really, really beg to differ. Even my ASEAN friends were doubtful that I was Asian (Well, technically parang dapat daw Pacific Islanders tayo). Not that they're bad lookers. Basta, hindi lang talaga. Haha. Kasi naman, enlightened by Aurea's observation, I really think that if I came from another country, say, Australia or Singapore, people would surely tell me na I look "Aussie" or "Singaporean" na. Yun kasi comment ko kay classmate AC when we had the class reunion. So, it's not that I distinctly transformed into having Korean features. Such statement is only prompted by people's prior knowledge that I come from Korea and not because I was judged on it's physical manifestation. Phew. There should be some psychosociological explanation to this. :P



The two most obvious changes people would say about me are:


1. The hair. - Okay. Sige, medyo sinadya ko na rin 'to. Haha. I just think it's sad when you're gone for a time and then wala man lamang nag-bago sa'yo. Although, the change was drastic, the impact wasn't much because people have seen me with it on pictures. But it still got the most winner hirit: "Uuuuuy! Blondie ka na ha!" - Ms. Neri. Oh yes, panalo.




2. The weight gain. - Fat? Nah. Tumaba? Oo. Haha. Minsan inu-unahan ko na nga mga tao na sabihin na tumaba ako. The chubby cheeks and the tummy that I've been trying to hide under pregnant style dresses give it away. I'm actually starting to like how curvy I'm getting. Teeeheee. *slap* Hahaha. But right now, I could really use some exercise to help myself. :P

***

Tomorrow, me and my dad will do just that. I'm not exactly the beautiful bum I saw myself to be. I guess, only Paris Hilton could pass for one. I've asked people what to do for the time that I'll be an OSY and a lot of wondeful things seemed to await me. There's just so many things to do! But even I myself  think, there's so little time to do them! My one month has already been consumed by purely bumming around (as in, just in bed watching tv bumming), catching up with friends (but there's still so many people I'm missing!), and work (kumikitang kabuhayan ito!).

I'm now employed by my dad to help out in his business... I'm kind of overwhelmed because I'm given serious office work that'll impact the daily operations. Pressure. Pressure. Pressure. Pero, kinakaya. The whole thing interests me actually. I've also gained so many insights that I think it calls for a separate entry. I'm also the first child who agreed to help out. I'm well compensated after all. 25,000 for 3 months, free lunch and no transportation cost is a sweet deal. ^_^ You still need the green to liwaliw.

So for now, life begins after 5pm...

No, not really. Hahaha. Well, it's been more than a month now since I'm back... and... Yeah, I just feel there should be something said about it. I planned to put these thoughts in writing that I figured only my handheld journal should have the privilege of... But eversince I came back, I guess I just didn't find the time or the feeling to do so. I guess that personal bubble I enjoyed is now tampered with thanks to the loveable people around me.

There are still a couple of pages from my old planner in Korea that should have been filled and for me to place that final dot concluding my experience there. Then it would be stacked with my other notebooks where details of my life are shamelessly documented in unorganized blots.

This should be fine for now. Multiply and my neglected livejournal (but I still love you) has been my lifeline to the world out here and I'm extremely grateful.

Okay intro lang 'to. I actually have to say goodbye now.

I promised my lolo to spend a week with him in Bulacan. Gusto ata ng bagong kainuman. Haha. This should be fun. I'll probably write the rest of this entry there. Feed our new ducks and turkeys. Maybe weed and cut some grass. Pick fresh vegetables and attempt to cook. Hah! Climb our mango trees or better yet, drive along them. As if. Oh, play basketball! See how the rice mill works. Pero feeling ko, I'll end up having a DVD marathon. Hahaha!





TOODLES!

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