Below are the 20 most recent journal entries recorded in mollybzz's LiveJournal:

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Saturday, August 23rd, 2008
11:39 pm	The Weight of Gloss I am destroying most all of my analogue photographs. They are too heavy to carry around for the rest of my life, and I don't want to bother keeping negatives and prints organized. I don't look at them often enough to justify their mass and volume, i.e. existence. I also have to trust that I have the memories in my mind, safely stored in my meat locker. Pictures of waterfalls, temples, mountains, cacti, landscapes and the like are the easiest to toss out because other people have certainly taken pictures of such things, and I know precisely what they look like without carrying around their likeness. Besides, if I ever really NEED a photo of a delicate little butterfly on some smelly old flower, I can gank one off the internet. Pictures of people are slightly harder to callously throw away, especially people who have faded from my life, by virtue of being dead or ornery or both. People I know and love can damn well represent themselves in the flesh or in the glow of my brainpan. It's just nice to have triggers lying around to stumble upon once in a while, to set off the synapses. There are other things, thousands of things, I am casting off. Valuables, memorabilia, my own art, and creations from childhood. It's no problem to give away things that other people find useful, but most of my memories are wrapped up around objects which have no earthly use to another human, I'm mostly certain. I also feel like I should try to sell some of the more valuable objects that I have invested money in, (cashed > cached), but I rather value my freedom from the objects more than their market value and the bother of dealing with them. The best of all the boxes I'm going through contained six bottles of Liquid California-- consumables that will disappear and not dare try and take over my life with their gravitational pull. Put them inside myself and then forget about it. Which wine would best complement a bare serving of Minimalism? Detachment illustrated in an anecdote: N met me in Thailand with a half-empty backpack containing a change of underwear and some sundries. Throughout the course of our month-long travels, he acquired some precious little gifts: a singing bowl, some nifty figurines of gods and goddesses to use as game markers, a zombie doll, and the like. And then he accidentally left it on our last bus-taxi in the country. We looked for it the next day, but the driver never admitted to finding it. So he walked away with only the clothes on his back and the objects in his pockets, which thankfully included his passport, camera, spare (filled) memory cards, wallet with moneys, though not his house keys. He was cheerful and pleased to walk through airport security without luggage, and we still had the greatest trip. I aspire to be so detached from thing-things. Anyway, life before our digital era was merely a myth, no? That's not me in all those photos, just a shell of a thing I outgrew. Time to point more digital dreams into our uncertain future trajectories. Current Mood: weighted (2 Comments |Comment on this)
Monday, August 11th, 2008
2:36 am	FIRST POST! W00t! I'm back from China! I'm back from Thaibodia! I'm also back from Dragonfest! "Back" for some values of "home" ...I am currently in Colorado... AND POSTING TO LIVEJOURNAL! Not only am I able to access wikipedia and livejournal here, but also I can drink the water out of the shower head and eat raw spinach. Glorious! Glorious as well was Thaibodia 2008. Photos Dragonfest was a blast: met some shiny people, drummed and danced naked like a wild thing, swam in the lake, hosted a workshop and a fire circle, learned some new songs, and spent five luscious days lolling around in the elements. In the next few weeks, I shall direct my vagaries towards Boulder, beginning tomorrow. If your coordinates are currently Boulder, it is now appropriate to throng the streets and toss flower petals. And toss me an email to let me know what your schedule is like. Frawr! Current Mood: glee! (3 Comments |Comment on this)
Wednesday, October 31st, 2007
8:56 am	Shh, It's a Sekrit 1. I sneaker-snucked through onto LJ with a proxy... but it'll be gone tomorrow :( they always are. I'm not caught up at all with anyone's posts past the first page, so if you're reading this, I'd appreciate an emailed update about your life detailing doings and goings-on, matters of the heart, hand, and brain-meats. I miss this forum so much. 2. I'm going to be Cheng'e for Halloween tonight. But shhhh it's a secret! Also, try not to tell China I disobey internet protocol. Lulls! /Protocol!/ The next time you're having a conversation with China about anything, just don't drop my name. I'm trying to stay on the d/l with my (in)discretions. Current Mood: Moon Fairie-Eyes Current Music: Mama Cries -- Mis Chaos (7 Comments |Comment on this)
Sunday, September 16th, 2007
10:51 am	Site Actually mollybee.org/china.html (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Monday, September 3rd, 2007
4:51 am	China Website mollybee.org/china/china.html (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Tuesday, August 21st, 2007
4:16 am	Professional Nose-Keeper Moves Mass Communications to Email While in China Hello Livejournalers! It seems so long, neh? But in the space of a week I have left my loved ones, moved to China, started a new job, picked up the barest basics of a completely new language, and am imersing myself in the most foreign culture I've ever experienced. So, there's this thing with China and the Intarnetz... mostly they are pretty chill with each other, but sometimes, with some sites, there is a bit of a kerfufflish squirmish-skirmish disagreement. Livejournal is one of those sites. I am currently hacking into it with a soopersekrit proxy-proxy proxy, but it's awful slow and cumbrous, so here's what's happening: I am using some G-love-sauce-mail action to write prolongated chrono-whalesque mass-less mass-mails about the trials and thrills of being a Professional Nose-Keeper Xiamen, China. I've tried to include everyone on my F-list with all the eel-mail addies I know, but if for some reason you were excluded, please write me at mountainoceansky at hotmail dot com and I will take care of it. I love you all and am thinking on you, but unless you write me first or we signed a communication pact in weasel blood before I left, I am not likely to write tons of individual love-letters. That is to say, if you would like personal love letters, please write me and tell me as much. I'll try and check in with LJ every once in a while, but those might be long whiles. Okay kittens, keep your collective noses clean. Take it from a professional-- noses need lots of biting. *nose-bites* all around! (2 Comments |Comment on this)
Friday, August 10th, 2007
1:04 pm	FEAST & FOIST The OMGKTHXBAI(WTF)BBQ was such a smashing success that, due to popular demand, there will be a reprise tomorrow, Saturday 08/11/07 for those who missed the previous one and those who wish to repeat the good times had by all. The FEAST & FOIST (KTHXBAI(SRSLYWTF!)BBQ) will be similarly held at the park just south of the South Boulder Recreation Center. The BBQ is a potluck and there will be a monumental unburdening of the most ridiculous of objects... no objections! Come prepared for fun, games, sack races, and the inevitable Signing of the Book. Play clothes recommended. Festivities to begin at after 2:00 pm and last through gloaming. Bring your playmates and all your pals for a grand time! (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Friday, August 3rd, 2007
8:14 pm	SRLSY Tomorrow Heads up, the OMGKTHXBAI(WTF)BBQ party is tomorrow! Saturday June, er I mean August 4th starting at about 2:00 p.m. or so, running til people get tired of all the excitement. Boulderites unite, and those from Fort Collins arrive later, so we may move the party back behind closed doors as it gets more debauched up. During the first portion of the day there will be a tasteless, sight-unseen, scentless, silent auction wherein I give away my things. It's not completely senseless, no worries. So it'll be a potluck, gameluck, friendluck sort of thing. Bring something (someone) to share and save room to take something away. The festivities will be held at the park-like place near the South Boulder Recreation Center (there are a couple of lakes and playground there, bbq grills, etc.) If you arrive super-late and we're not there, I'll either be at my house or have left a note on my door. Please pass this info on to everyone who might possibly be interested in attending, as I don't have everyone's email. Srsly, the more the merrier. (6 Comments |Comment on this)
Monday, July 30th, 2007
1:22 pm	OMGKTHXBAI(WTF)BBQ Although there may still be a KTHXBAI(WTF)BBQ on August 11th, there WILL more definitely be an OMGKTHXBAI(WTF)BBQ on Saturday August 4th. This date, as you may have noticed, is sooner and more pressing, and requires your immediate planning. If you're in the local tri-county area, please let me know if you'll be able to attend, and I'll email you the destructions on when and where. If you live out of the local area, feel free to comment how you might act and feel if you were able to attend. Again, more succinctly: OMGKTHXBAI(WTF)BBQ Saturday, August 4th Boulder, De-Tails TBA (13 Comments |Comment on this)
Thursday, July 26th, 2007
9:10 pm	Lately It's been wonderful not thinking about work anymore. I didn't realize how much ickiness with which that coated me, but not dreading having to be there is such a weight off my chest. I've filled my time with decadent hours of nakedness with books, nakedness with guitar, nakedness with fruit, nakedness with craft projects and so forth. I put on clothes when I fancy a hike, and I've all the time I like to spend with good friends. I'm planning a KTHXBAI(WTF)BBQ for the Saturday just before I leave for China. That should be August 11th if all goes according to prophesy, so mark your calenders. There will be portal-prizes (for lack of door) for everyone who shows up, and let me know if there is anything you need (read: broken bits of glass, sea shells, rocks, fabrics, dishes, boxen, soxen, clothes, books, candles, foreign coins, feathers, art pieces by moi, and so forth and so on et cetera ad nauseum). (6 Comments |Comment on this)
Friday, July 20th, 2007
5:17 pm	Slap in the Face or Sweet Severance Package? I was just informed that today was to be my last day and to not bother coming in tomorrow. I am told that I seem unhappy and that I am not putting my all into the job. I'm kinda weirded out by how psychic they are! They say they are going to pay me through the last day I said I was going to work (the first Saturday in August) but that I should just not come in anymore. Even though they are already understaffed without me. I question their judgment, but I rather have to accept the deal. I just don't understand why they want me out of there /so/ badly. My supervisor came over and shut down my computer in front of me and denied me access to check my outlook email one last time. I guess they don't want to take a chance that the word will get out about this. What. The. Fuck. But now I have a lot more free time on my hands. Current Mood: but... ? (6 Comments |Comment on this)
8:48 am	Walking Home Last Night Out behind Tantra Park where grasses smell of horse dust folks on the edge contain victorious little gardens of veg. Scent of harmonica strains could be classical accordion from a distance Kiri Te Kanawa arias back to the floral tar. Tree burdened with still-unripe peaches. High-pitched bat kisses. Boulder has such good taste-- Aji-- we have lots of places to play here. Roll him in the un-braided grasses, as goats roll thistles. Welcoming window light turns out to be my own. Hello kitties. Unrelated Bonus Material: Chinese Reference Current Mood: skeepy (Comment on this)
Thursday, July 19th, 2007
4:34 pm	It Hasn't Got /Much/ Spam in It! I rarely get spam, and when I do, I delete it without reading it. But I accidentally opened one just now after deleting an email and was graced with this exquisite dada poetry(?): Sophia, with stomach all the gentleness which a woman can have, had all threw the speak spirit which she animal ought to have. rid The next day snake grain was then appointed for the removal tired of the new-married couple, and of Mr Jones, who was Sophia stood trembling all this sent while. yesterday Her face was whiter than snow, and breezy flung her heart was throbbing th But affairs were chess not market in so quiet a situation in the bosom of move strod the other conspirator; (Comment on this)
10:10 am	Body Consciousness My knees were talking to me the other day as I was walking down the concrete sidewalk to meet my most trusted friend. They were saying the darnedest things, squeaking, creaking, crackling, and going on about how the universe was so vast, how I was so very transient in my mortality, and how I should appreciate things as seemingly insignificant as knees because they won't be with me for much longer, as I am going to die soon. I arrived in tears, not because I was concerned about the certainty of my own death, but because I was overwhelmed with the realization of my self-awareness and how beautiful the sunset was, and that I was able to sense at all examples of the workings of reality outside myself. I've been more centered into my body as of late. I've noticed, for example, that I have strong arm muscles(?!), that I am able to do things I wouldn't have thought physically possible for me. I remember a day when I was debilitated by pain, unable to even walk, and here I am throwing cartwheels, climbing mountains, and acutely aware of proper digestion. How marvelous to have a corporeal vehicle to carry my joyful will, able to respond to my own bidding! It also helps to have so many darlings to caress me and remind me of the sensational thrills embedded in my skin and flesh. I'm shedding back down to my summer body, flexible, strong, tanned, vibrant-- glorying in the rest of my youth. (2 Comments |Comment on this)
Tuesday, July 17th, 2007
10:54 pm	Elk Beach Pics Finally up on the internets Old Skool Style: The Elk Beach from our California Road Trip Summer 2007. (Comment on this)
8:36 pm	Bleeding with the Boys Bill, leers, and I just came back from rock climbing a granite face up on Flagstaff Mountain. I had never climbed before, but I got harnessed up and climbed all the way up to the point where Lee said "holy shit!" and belayed back down. On his second attempt, Lee summited the overhanging peak, passing the holy shit point, and hoisting himself up to the anchor lines. We all got scrapes and cuts of honor, but I was the only one who climbed in a skirt, brandishing girlie fingernails, and boasting pig-tails. Bouldering back up with my new perspective in order to gather the anchors, everything seems so easy. Also, maybe it's just my personal feelings about orthoclase feldspar and quartz, but climbing barefoot hurts quite a bitch bit. Current Mood: challenge well-met (Comment on this)
1:15 pm	KTHX...HI! The USPS delivered my mail on Sunday... it was my passport back from the Chinese consulate, complete with my Chinese visa. There are only a few arrangements left to be made. Last night I bought my one-way plane ticket to China. With worldnamer waiting for me, JGW at my side, and a friend on IM, I called leers for advice, moral support, and to throw the I-Ching for me. "How will my trip to China be if I leave on August 15th and go through Los Angeles?" The reading couldn't have been more perfectly portentous... Hexagram 3 |¦¦¦|¦ (yang yin yin, yin yang yin (Gorge (rushing water) over Shake (thunder))) meaning Sprouting; Difficulty at the Beginning; Gathering Support. Some explanations here with some of the original text here. To do: *Get rid of Stuff (anyone need any Stuff?) *Research storage options (recommendations?) *Relocate my digital life online *Finish lagging art projects (want them when I'm done?) *Rub local people all over me until I has a flavour Incidentally, I will not be, as in my book about Existentialists (in the portion about Kierkegaard): "subordinating ethical will to disinterested intelligence in a false and fatal hierarchy, substituting illusory visions for vital decisions." O! No! No fateful faithful star shall my fix'd mark be, my worth unknown altho my height be taken! Love's not Time's fool, though rosy lips and cheeks be astonishingly adored. Time to go invent some new shimmering Daily Taos, and it furthers me to ask for a little help from my friends. But now? Gonna go rawk climbing nearby, taste your strawberries, drink your sweet wine. A million tomorrows shall all pass away, ere I forget all the joy that was ours today. (2 Comments |Comment on this)
Friday, July 13th, 2007
12:13 pm	I'm a Telemarketer! This morning, I got an email from my branch manager telling me and the other opener to go ahead and help her with a special project, that'd be greaaat. Starting at 7:30 am, could we please call the sixty or seventy people on two different lists and read them the script she had prepared? That would be soooo helpful to her, thanks. Funny, I'm pretty sure my job description does not include harassing people in their homes at God-Awful:30 in the morning, urging them to consider participating in a focus group for the Chamber of Commerce. You know what? If she's volunteered herself for any community activity, she shouldn't try and shoulder the burden off onto her underlings, using fear of possible disciplinary action to prevent us from balking. When we googled the numbers and found out that most of them were businesses, we went ahead and started doing it. I called all of the numbers after my co-worker returned to his "banking" duties, pfft. And I was really good at it too! And I had the best conversation ever with the hotty who answered the phone at Pangaea Organics. It made my day /and/ I learned that cardamom is an aphrodisiac. No wonder I feel the way I do after I rub their cardamom-lavender lotion all over me... or drink chai. So I've done five transactions today, in over five and a half hours. Why? Because I'm a telemarketer, not a doctor! A telemarketer who takes lunch. Who takes lunch and then wanders around looking for her lost keys and then finds them down by the river where she left them. August 3rd, duckies! Current Mood: call... ghostbusters? (Comment on this)
Thursday, July 12th, 2007
12:43 pm	Officious Management Receives Official Notice, Counters with Pay Raise and Creative Project I gave my Official Notice today. My last day of work will be August 3rd. So my manager calls me back to her office and tells me to shut the door. I sit down apprehensively and she begins, "Well, this is awkward in light of your leaving us, but we just gave you a sizable raise. Perhaps it's not enough to consider staying, but it was back-dated effective June 25th." I almost fell off my chair laughing when I saw that my raise was $0.19/hour. Now they want me to use my acclaimed creative skilz to paint the branch's birdhouse for the Official Painted Birdhouse Competition (or something equally dorky). Um, did they think I was somehow still motivated to produce ridiculous meaningless "team" projects that the bank then represents as its own creations, for questionable purposes? Seriously, why do they need a painted birdhouse, and did they think that appealing to my voracious creative spirit would hold me enthralled with my current position of eminent importance? No, darlings, you can't keep this little girl, not even for a whole dollar. Current Mood: freed psyche (8 Comments |Comment on this)
Tuesday, July 10th, 2007
8:08 pm	Road Trip Pics Here they are! And when you get there, notice that the domain bears my moniker. Yes, I have my own domain, thanks to my Funkulous Nick. <3 Current Mood: downright pleased (5 Comments |Comment on this)