| WOOO-HOOO!!!!!!! |
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| 11:12am 03/06/2004 |
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mood:  giddy
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I have a job! A full time job! My Dream job!!!!! As of Monday June &th I will officially be the first ever Classroom Assistant of Pike Market Childcare and Preschool! I am SO F-ing happy, I could cry! I will be working in all the classrooms, which is a big plus, and sense my position is brand new I will have A LOT of input into how it will work!!!!!
On another happy note, I am going to the Tri Cities tomorrow with Chelsea to research one of the books I'm writing. We are gunna go hang out at her old High school during lunch and go check out the places where teens hang so I can get a feel for what it would be like to be a black kid living out there.
So things are pretty good! Not to mention I had lots of awesome sex the other night to top it all off! Well thats all fer now!
Peace out,
E |
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| Woo-Hoo! |
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| 10:46am 05/04/2004 |
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mood: artistic music: Black Eyed Peas
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I'm writing a new song! Things are good for the most part. I need more black folks around me causew I'm sick of every where I go looking around and beeing painfully aware that I am either the only or one of like two or three people of color for what seems like miles. The only other not so good thing going on with me write now is chourus. I don't know if I should stay, I'm not having fun and I seem to be leaving rehursals unhappy. Two old friends of mine are back in town, that is exciting! I need to TALK with one of them, but I think she has grown some and things will be all good.
This past weekend I went up to Anacortes for a show and the van broke down! We ended up spending a great deal of time on the side of the freeway, but the show started late so it was all good. I also must say that it was a much nicer stuck on the side of the freeway expierince than my last one. That one involved running accross 5 or 6 lanes of freeway trafic, climbing a STEEP hill and getting atacked by a chain link fence! The show was GREAT and I got to sleep with a sugle budy when we got home! Alls well that ends well I guess.
I guess thats all fer now!
Peace out y'all
Eryc |
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| Wow look I'm updating! |
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| 02:35pm 11/03/2004 |
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Hey. So I spent all of last weekend with Sasa. I had a BLAST!!! I love her she's the best! (you see that grrl, yer the best, I mean that!) I smoked some pot, which for those of you who know me, you know that doesn't happen often, it was funny! I finnaly met Sara's friend Ty, that was good I like her, though I could have done without being in Belveue. On sinday we went to the subhumans show. The virus and the unseen oppened. I didn't even know that the virus was gunna be there, then I walked in and noticed that the band on stage sounded familiar. Then they played a song I recognized (rats in the city) and I was all like wow. The unseen rocked of course, and I was in the pit for pretty much all of the subhumans set, didn't get too beat up though. I don't know if thats good or bad. Anyway the show was awsome, I ran into a bunch of old friends which was cool, I also ran into a friend that I had been at odds with and we kissed and made up. That was good! I've been working alot which is good, I miss Stafany but I lost her number, so hey grrl if you read this gimme a call or drop me an email, k? I've been working with some kids to start a quarterly barter fairs in the city, thats going well. And I talked to one of my best friends who is currently in Virginia, but is comming out to visit soon, I'm glad cause I miss her a lot. Any way thats all for now I guess.
Later
Eryc |
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| Things are lookin up |
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| 03:04pm 03/02/2004 |
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mood:  rejuvenated music: I'm singing songs from Chicago!
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So my life has been pretty good sense last wednesday. On wednesday I went and jammed with that band. It was cool one of them said I was the best they had seen so far...good sign. One of them said I was so good I needed a back up band...not so good a sign. So who knows, over all it went well I really liked their music and I think we are a good fit, I just hope they think so too.
Then thursday was mostly good. I went to get some stuff from Ari's and we had a bit of a fight, but then we where able to talk like civilized human beings so thats good. That night I went out dancing with my friend Ashlee, while we where there I ran into a friend I hadn't seen in almost two years! That was really cool, so the three of us hung out till Mariah(the long lost friend)had to go, we exchanged numbers. There was this really HOT punky grrl there and by the end of the night we danced. That was cool.
Friday I ended up going out with Mariah and two of her friends Suzanne and Chelsea. We went to a cocktail party then to the Mercury. Chelsea and Suzanne both turned out to be big freaks for Buffy too which is cool. Chelsea and I really hit it off, we are a lot alike. Both vegan, both wiccan, both sing, we both LOVE buffy and our politics are similar. Cool.
Saturday I went to see Chicago with my rents and Ashlee. IT WAS FUCKING AMAZING!!!!!!! Sunday I went and got more stuff from Ari's, that was of course hard cause I miss him and moving my stuff out makes thigs feel even more final. I hung out with Chrystain then had Pho, the had a little L word party at my place with Ashlee, Cole, Chelsea, me and my mom. It was cool, Afterwords we all watched Marget Cho's I'm the One I Want. It was hilarious of course. So yeah things are going pretty well for me pluss I just had a hot bath. Whoda thunk it huh? Any way gotta jet.
Peace out y'all
Eryc |
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| Its been a LONG time, I know |
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| 12:57pm 25/01/2004 |
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I know I haven't posted in here for ages. Any way my life has been crazy. Most of you know that Avery and I broke up. so of course that is sad though its for the best. I have had time to think about what I want for me and one of those things is him in my life. If we tried to stay together I don't think that would be quite as possible. Love may still be there but contrary to popular film love isn't always enough. I know we will stay close friends, though it will take some time.
As for the rest of my life, I have been hanging out with my mom a lot, shes the best. I have a job interview tomorrow for this daycare in the U district. I really hope i get the job, goddess knows I need one! I have also been writing and singing alot and am working on getting back into dance. I am auditioning to sing with a band on wednesday, I hope that goes well. Every body send me good singing vibes at around 6:30pm on wednesday! Over all things are better then I thought they would be just a week ago, cause though breaking up sucks, especially when you still love the person, when you realize that in the long run it will most likely be for the best things don't seem so bad. Any way I gotta go.
Laterz
Eryc |
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| a post ... well its not real |
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| 11:09pm 13/11/2003 |
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| It's been a while.... |
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| 08:27am 19/06/2003 |
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Hey I know I'm a slaker when it comes to updating this thing, but oh well. I'm actualy going to update about something that happend a week ago.....LE TIGRE!!!!!! So last thursday I saw Le Tigre for the second time(first as Eryc). Besides being A-FUCKING-MAZING, it stirred up alot of stuff for me. Like all my questions about how far I really want to go in transition, and how despratly I need a community that I don't think I will find anywhere, and last I felt real happy there and a part of something while the show was goin on. Even up untill now, I felt like I had a place, that I fit somewhere. Now I'm back to feeling as though I'm drifting through life aloneish. I realized that I was spoiled early on. See when I was 17, I found a group of peers that really reflected all I was. This group was an activist group called QYR(Queer Youth Rights). Within this group was a beautiful mix of gay, bi, and lesbian kids, kids of collor, punk rock kids, and then(later on) even some trans kids. And being an activist group, we where all a part of or working on getting to be a part of anti: racism, sexism, classism moovements as well as anti homophobia/heterosexism, and trans phobia. It was heaven, but I haven't been able to find a similer group sence then. When I was at the Le Tigre show I felt a brush of the goodness that QYR was for me. Being around all those people there for the same reason, and feeling the energy around us brought me back.
I don't think it is impossible to find a place where I fit ever again, its just hard. Especily in Seattle, cause though there are lots of queers, trans people, activists, and even punx, its pretty white. I guess I shold consider myself lucky that I have two friends that just happen to be trans guys, and black. And I do, I am. Oh well what ever, Le Tigre ROCKED! Real hard and I'm still standin, so I guess alls well, huh?
Peace out,
Eryc |
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| Crazy |
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| 12:05am 31/05/2003 |
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mood: nerdy music: Go Sailor
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So my boi, Chrystain and I all went to see Finding Nemo today. It was good, funny and all. But also kinda stressfull. You'll probably have to see it to understand, but its true.
Any way I'm doin pretty good. I wish I would have listend to myself when my friend convinced me to go on depo to stop bleading. I though it was a bad Idea. But he had NO complaints so I said what the hell. Now I have gained weight which is really not good sence Ihave to bind a REALLY LARGE chest that has now gotten bigger. I have got to now be the moodyest F-in person IN THE WORLD! Then to top it all off, the worst part, I lost my sex drive almost compleatly, and fer those who know me you know that is an event so huge it should like stop the earth from turning or something! Needless to say I AM NOT EVER GETTING ANOTHER SHOT. Now I want to make sure that my friend who sugested it knows that I am not mad at them, you had know idea this would all happen to me, I still luv ya dogg.
So now that that has been said, I feel much better.
Besides that stuff I have been doin well, though if I don't get a steady job soon, I'm gonna go CRAZY!!! I am gratfull that I have the on call gig with the day care and that I am in the chourus. Gives me stuff to do so I don't get all wiggy with cabin feaver.
I have decided that once I have steady income, a place, and all, I'm goanna start looking into getting studio time to record my songs. I have been waitin to long for all th people who say they can get me in (a recording studio) fer cheep or free. I gotta do it myself. Second I have decided to get back into my writing. I have tons of comic, short story and even novel ideas its time I get ta goin on all dat. Lastly I need to get mysel in to dancin again. I have beem choriographin like crazy, so somethins got ta happen. Any way I'm babaling now so I'll go.
Peace out ya'all,
Eryc |
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| 11:06am 28/05/2003 |
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You are the most phenomenal phenomenon since... I
don't know... since you're last incarnation.
You are brilliant and fiercely feminist. You
are Le Tigre.
What Dyke Band Are U?
brought to you by Quizilla
i mean they are the best |
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| I know, I know... |
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| 11:08am 19/05/2003 |
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...Its been a LONG time. I haven't posted cause life has been, well interesting. I have been kinda shitty lately, but then good, then stressed then good again. My gender stuff has been kicking me in the face lately. HARD. I feel like before I decided to bind every day and present more masculine that more people read me as male. Now that I try so hard, strapping down the 38 DD beasts and wearing more baggy clothes, so to hide my curves I get mamed more than I did before. My boi says its just cause I notice the negative more now that I want people to not read me as female. So every time someone calls me girl or mam or something it resonates more cause I get pissed. I know he is right. So i'm gonna try to really recognize every time I get sired or maned. I hope that will help.
I subed at the day care all last week with the pre-kindergarten kids. It was fun, but also turned me into a huge ball of stress! I am proud of myself though cause through the whole week I refrained from starving, bing/purging and...drum roll please.......getting drunk. I know its hard to believe , but its true. I wanted to but I didn't. But ya know after all the stress and what not it was worth it cause I'm not broke! (For the time being that is).
Not being broke is good, I bought LeTigre tickets fore Matty and me during my lunch break on Friday! I am so stoked! The last time I saw them I was in the after glow for like months! They are one of my most favorite bands, not to mention I LOVE Kathleen Hanna!
Any way I guess you can kinda see how things have been good and bad. Right now though they are GOOD cause My sweet boi Matty and I are staying at my rents house while they are on vacation. Its really nice, we are going to look for rings today! I'm supper happy right now, I could cry. Gosh that feels real good to realize that after all the shit, I'm REALLY happy and content RIGHT NOW. Thats nice
Peace out ya'll,
Eryc |
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| Dentists are E-V-I-L!!! |
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| 11:25pm 15/04/2003 |
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mood:  annoyed
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So I was experiencing some FUCKIN TERRIBLE tooth pain. I went to an emergency dental clinic to get it taken care of. So after looking at the X-rays I am told that I am going to need a root canal. Do you know what that means? $600.00!!! and thats cheap! I have no steady job so this sucks. Right now there is a temp filling thingy so I'm not in pain and I can eat again, but it still sucks.
DENTIST ARE GREEDY DEVILS!!!!!
thats all fer now.
Peace out,
Eryc |
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| Its been a while... |
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| 08:45pm 31/03/2003 |
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mood:  sore music: Erykah Badu
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I know, see a whole lot has been going on. The best of all of that is one,(some of you may know this). As of March 25th I am now legally Eryc Leroy Asher Nelson!!! Secondly, not as cool though, I got this tooth that was giving me hell pulled today. It was crazy, The Novocaine, wouldn't fully take so they had to give me three extra shots! Damn near the entire right side of my face was NUMB for like four and a half hours! But I'm glad cause soon I can chew like a normal person! That makes me HAPPY! My boi is SO sweet! See him and Chrystain went with me to the dentist, It took a long time cause the guy who was supposed to yank out my tooth wasn't there so i had to waite a long time. Meanwhile, my sweet boi was getting worried. Then when I got out he kept saying how cute I was all numb and trying to sing along with the punk music in the car. I LOVE YOU BABY!!!! Hey C dogg, thanx again fer rollin us around all day in yer truck, and hang in there. I guesse thats all fer now, Peace out y'all.
Eryc |
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| Its been a while |
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| 12:39pm 15/03/2003 |
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So I haven't updated in a while. I got the on call job as a substitute teacher at thet day care/preschool. I got my first pay check!!!! That was really exciting, it has been SO long. Other new stuff, I am a new member of the Seattle Lesbian & gay chours! I went to my first rehearsal last tuesday. It was good, a little nervous makeing, but good. It is really good to be singing again. I may finaly be recording my acapella CD soon! I'm stoked. I have been writing more lately, I might even finaly finish my zine. I recently came out to my oldest friend(I have known her sence birth)she took it well and is excited for me. Its good to be back in contact with her. Any way thats all fer now.
Peace out ya'll
Eryc |
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| 08:48pm 03/03/2003 |
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mood: exhausted
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Today was an interesting and tiering day. First off I didn't get to sleep until real late like 2 or 3. Now usually this wouldn't be a big deal, but I had to get up at 6 to go to a doctors appointment. So all groggy and out of it my boi and I pulled ourselves out of bed and got on the bus to go to the clinic. The we went home planing to sleep. Unfortunately for me I couldn't sleep. The at 2 I headed off to get a tour of the day care/preschool I will be subbing for. That went well I'm really stoked about it. After that I just wondered around down town for a while waiting for my boi to get out of a meeting. When we met up we went and bought tickets for a show and then on a bus home. I am so sleep deprived its not funny. Well actually it is kinda funny.
Peace out
Eryc
(sorry if that was really boring and strange or something). |
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| 10:33am 02/03/2003 |
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I feel lost,
Drifting lonley
though I am not alone,
Afraied
Terrified of what might become of me
Almost unwilling
to walk the path life has chosen for me,
Sometimes driven
to take the trechoroues paths
waiting around the corner for me
to wander onto.
Because it feels safe
though it is not safe,
Only familiar
I long to give into each one of them,
Allow them to steer me
into a dull familiarity
That masks its self as happieness
But some how every time
I start down any one of them
Reality steps in
to remind me of the pain and lothing
I am headed for,
Reminds me that the unknown
doesn't have to mean terrible,
It just means something new |
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| I am feeling so much right now. |
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| 02:04pm 01/03/2003 |
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Sometimes I think I worry too much, I worry about my friends, I worrie about my boi, and I worry about me. I guess I worry about me the least which is kinda fucked up. But Untill i can start to worry about me as much as I should I've got my Avery to make sure I go to the Dr. when I need to. Or that I eat when I should and encourage me to keep it down. He is such a good boy. I LOVE YOU BABY!
I worry about my friends and my boi i think just enough. I worry when I see any one I care about hurting themselves. I extend my helping hand but I also believe in their own ability to pull through. Good luck to Johnny, I always knew you had it in you to pull through. To any one else who is in a hard spot, don't give up. I guess thats it fer now hang in there all, I love you
Eryc |
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| I hate snow right now!!!! |
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| 11:54pm 17/02/2003 |
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mood: annoyed
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So my baby is stuck in DC. It really sucks. He was suposed to be home today and now it looks like he won't be here till wednsday. If the storm doen't chill out maybe not even then. I miss him lots, but at least now I know he is OK so I'm not worried so much any more. On another note, my food issues have chilled a bit fer now. I joined a pro ed recovery community rather than the pro-ana/mia one I was contemplating. I kicked it w/ Chrystian today, that was good. hey dogg, I just theought you should know YOU ROCK! For those of you who don't get that comment, I told him about my eating disorder and even though he doesn't quite understand it he offered to be there for me when ever I need it. Isn't he great? Yay for Chrystian!!!!
Any way i should go now.
Peace out ya'all
Eryc |
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